So that 'job' that I started a month ago has turned out to be a good thing. The 'job' that I so inconvenienced everyone with (for such low pay) has turned out to be something I could do well. It's to do with international logistics and it has turned out to be a really good opportunity to learn about the nitty gritty details in import and exporting, booking containers and dealing with shipping related matters. It's quite interesting and not as droll as I thought it would be. Most of all, it has given me an identity outside of what I do with my husband and I am quite liking it. I always knew that an independent soul like me could never work full time with my husband on a home business. I will end up despising him-through no fault of his own.
After less than one month, they have decided to hire me full time and permanent and I was even able to negotiate a salary that I could live with (being that I am new in this field). My flexibility and 'easy-going nature' (ha ha) has paid off. It's also great to work with real adults, who are not suffering from high school hangups. It's great to work with people in the same intellectual level as you and you are not prone to pettiness. It feels such a relief, after being at so many jobs where it's just an upgraded version of high school drama, where there were still 'cafeteria' seating arrangements, except now it's the lunch room.
The last couple of years, I have tried to work on myself, quietly. I have tried to not be swayed by the drama of others and to not let others negativity get to me and I tell myself that it's their problem not mine. Just because they are having a psychotic moment, it does not mean I have to join them. It's terribly hard at times, especially with the ones you love-it feels cold and detached to not get emotionally involved in their problems, but you can't. If I got involved with everyone emotionally, I would have to be committed by now.
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